Baby No. 3: In’s and Out’s
After experiencing two very different pregnancies, I feel confident in what I will be doing differently this time around. I feel like there are so many decisions that need to be made when preparing for a child, from what products and equipment are necessary to where and how you want to give birth.
I want to share a few things that I will be doing differently this time around for baby no. three and why it makes sense for our family. I pray that this encourages you to evaluate what is important to you and your family and allows you to decide how you desire your pregnancy journey to go.
Birth Planning:
I write “birth planning” loosely as I know that most of the time, things we plan don’t go as planned. Nevertheless, I still believe that it is necessary and empowering to plan and prepare your mind for what you desire to take place. Just as plans don’t always work out, a lot of times they do, so why not prepare for the best-case scenario?
In:
Birth Doula - this is something that I wanted to invest in with my second pregnancy for many reasons, the main reason being advocacy and education regarding birth/delivery options. Unfortunately, with my second pregnancy, I was unable to find a birth Doula whose beliefs aligned with my beliefs and with whom I felt I could connect. Thankfully, this time around, my now Doula came highly recommended by one of my closest friends who had just given birth with her support. My doula and I share the same spiritual beliefs, which is honestly the most important aspect to me because when it comes down to it, I need someone who will stop and pray with me. She also has the most joyful spirit and truly desires to create a safe, calm, and enjoyable birth experience for her clients. I feel much more empowered and educated going into this birth than I had in the past.
Prenatal courses and birth prep - I’ve never taken a prenatal course with either of my last two pregnancies or focused on preparing my body for delivery. My doula shared the importance of this type of preparation not only for educational purposes but also for mental and physical prep. So, this time around I will be seeing a chiropractor, taking birth courses and gaining all of the education I can prior to delivery.
Out:
Solely relying on the medical system to make decisions for me and my baby - In the past, I allowed fear and lack of education to take over anytime I was in the presence of a medical professional. I did not question their opinion or push back when I felt uncomfortable. I just went with whatever I was told, and that led to experiences that could have been avoided or, in the best case, more positive. I want to encourage any moms-to-be to take the time and invest in the proper education and resources so they can feel empowered when questions or concerns are presented. If possible, I would highly recommend bringing on a birth doula.
Eating for two: I know this may be controversial, but here are my thoughts. I know that my body requires more calories to sustain the growth of the baby and to keep me energized, but I think that there is a lot of misinformation about what this looks like in a healthy way. My biggest goal for this pregnancy is to care for my body the best way that I can, making what I eat a top priority. Not every day is perfect, but I try to be mindful of creating balance within my meals. So, when it comes to the phrase “eating for two,” I feel like it is encouraging women to eat double what they would normally, and for me, that just made me feel tired, sluggish, and overly full. On the other hand, when I focus on eating several smaller, balanced meals that are high in protein, healthy fats, and carbs throughout the day, I feel sustained, full, and energized. Don’t get me wrong, some days look like pastries and Chick-fil-A, and that is okay, but most of the time, I try to maintain balance so I can feel good and prepare my body as best as I can for delivery.
Baby Supplies:
In:
An intimate baby sprinkle - I have so much to think about in preparation for the baby, and the last thing I want to do is stress about hosting a large group of people, choosing games and activities, etc. This time around, I will be celebrating the arrival of our baby by gathering with my closest friends and family and sharing a delicious meal in a stress-free, calm setting! I truly believe that this is an opportunity for moms-to-be to be able to rest in the presence of loved ones before the baby comes rather than stress over entertaining.
Requesting essential items on my registry - This is something that now makes so much sense to me. Previously, I filled my registry with cute clothing and accessories for my babies. Now, I plan on requesting things like diapers and wipes, car and stroller accessories, or a baby sling/carrier. These are all items that are essential for the baby, and I know they would be used, while on the other hand, most of the clothing I requested before ended up not fitting my baby and went unused or was donated.
Out:
Purchasing an excess amount of newborn clothing + accessories - By the time my second baby arrived, he was only able to wear newborn clothing for maybe a week, and I had to donate the rest. This also goes for purchasing pacifiers, bottles, and the list goes on. You just don’t know what your baby will like until they arrive. If you don’t want to be stuck with a bunch of clothing and accessories that your baby won’t use, opt for purchasing 0-3 month clothing and maybe waiting until your little one arrives to get things like pacifiers and other accessories.
A crib + full nursery - With my first pregnancy, we did an entire nursery. It was perfect, but it wasn’t used until he was about a year old. It sat there in its glory and collected dust. I would absolutely love to create a beautiful room for this baby, but I just would not feel so rushed to complete it, knowing that the baby will be in a side sleeper for the first few months.
These are just a few things that we plan on doing differently this time around; there are many more small changes we are implementing so that this experience is as peaceful and enjoyable as it can be. I pray that this gives you the confidence to make choices that allow you to create a peaceful pregnancy and birth experience.
